Buildbridgesnotwalls!!!      

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12 July 2007

This section will be for actual case histories with the names of the people concerned changed to protect their privacy.

Just click on the date and you will be taken to a new screen.

Their stories will be an inspiration to all who read them. 

They bring tears to my eyes and my heart seems to be relocated into my throat!

The joy that is apparent as these people realise how far they have come.  They find a hope where there was hopelessness. They find a strength where they experienced
lack of it.

One has actually realised that they were so changed in an area that they didn't know they had changed until later!

The reaction to a situation was completely different to what it would normally have been!


19 August 2007

A young man realised that he had a simple strategy to handle 'down' times.  

A couple who were withdrawing from each other as many do without realising what was happening - one had built 'walls' which in turn shut the other out as walls tend to.

What is this web site about?

Thanks for visiting this site. I trust you will enjoy and benefit from your visit and that you will get in contact with me to let me know what you think. 

I am not an engineer whose delight is building bridges and whose pet hate is building walls! 

Bridges are usually to either over something - a river, a road, a railway line, or spanning a gap ( I guess that's over something - the gap!)  (Though I want a bridge in my garden. My husband asks me what is it going over? We don't have a river flowing through our garden nor do we have large gaps that can't be stepped over - therefore we have no need for a bridge. My reply is it doesn't have to go over anything, it can just go over the grass - I just want a bridge!   But then it will be going over something - the grass!)  (I am still without a bridge!)

Walls are designed to keep something out or something in.  They protect us.  We feel safe within walls. When we go into our homes and close the door we are protected from whatever is outside by its walls.  At present where I live its extremely cold so the walls of our home keep the cold out.  We are snug and warm inside our walls! But then everyone knows that!  Though not everyon expriences it! There was the Berlin Wall - it divided Berlin!  So walls also devide!

This web site is not about the physical bridges and walls we can see, feel, walk over.  Its dealing with the walls we build, yes to protect ourselves from different emotional experiences usally hurts, disappointments and the like.  And the bridges we can also build to enable us to move on with our lives and get somewhere. The same walls we build to protect ourselves can shut out the very thing which will enable us to move on.

Now that's where bridges come in...again not the physical bridges but those emotional bridges we build...

This all started whilst watching a soapie!  It is one of the longest running Australian soapies.  One of the characters is in a wheelchair after an accident at the race track where he saved a little girl from injury.  The result: he finished up without the use of his legs.  Sometime later he found out that there was no medical reason why he can't walk.  He became engaged to the women of his dreams (a real soapie!) who encourged him to make peace with his parents particularly his mother.  Which he did.  The writer of the script had a very good understanding of the power of forgiveness.  They forgave each other and their relationship was healed for the first time since our hero was around three years of age.

When I saw that I said to my husband "They built bridges and not walls!"  It was actually very moving to see these two grown people realise that they each needed to forgive and be forgiven.  Also the script writer has an understanding of the strong link between our emotional state and our physical.  I made the remark that our hero will be able to walk again!

I know it is only a soapie but there is a lot of truth in what was presented.  How many of us today would benefit from a few bridges being built!

When one thinks about what a bridge does.  The purpose of bridges.  They are not just some structure some engineer or town planner decided to design, fund and build just because they like bridges.  They have a function.  They span two spaces enabling movement forward.  Cars are driven over a bridge to get to the other side.  People walk over a bridge to also get to the other side for whatever reason.

One of my daughter-in-laws said to me when she asked me if I wanted to speak with my son when I rang her up to wish her a Happy Birthday and I said 'No, I rang up to speak with you!"  To which she answered, "If he is unhappy about that I will tell him to build a bridge and get over it!"

I think you may be getting an understanding of what this website is about.  There are many bridges we need to build in our lives to mend relationships or to simply have a happier day with those around us. 

I am hoping that when you read this that you would like to make contact with me and discuss this or even if you want to talk about areas in your life where building a bridge would help you.

Thanks for reading this

Maureen Steininger

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